That’s it, reality TV.
We give up. You win.
Every time we think this genre of entertainment cannot get any more absurd or far-fetched, we fire up the Internet or turn on the small screen and we’re proven wrong.
We figured we’d never be shocked again after Bristol Palin was hired to come on board as full-time Teen Mom OG cast member next season.
But now comes word that someone from who past will also appear on upcoming episodes.
Scroll down to see who we mean and prepare for your jaw to hit the floor in 3… 2… 1…
Yes, Bristol Palin Really is Joining the Show
This announcement, which we still cannot get over, was made in mid-July, taking all fans by total and complete shock.
Is Bristol a Teen Mom?
No, but she was easily the most famous pregnant teenager in the country back when her mother ran for Vice President in 2008 and America learned that Palin, at 17 years old, was expecting a child.
What About Now?
Palin has three kids: a son named Tripp and two daughters, Sailor and Atlee. She is divorced from the father of her second two children, Dakota Meyer.
Who is the Father of Her Firstborn?
Levi Johnston, to whom Bristol was briefly engaged back during the 2008 Presidential campaign and someone who was rather prominent on the national scene at the time.
It’s True!
This goes back a decade, so we understand if some readers may not have been following the news closely back then. But, look, here he is ON STAGE at the Republican National Convention.
And Here He Is Shaking Hands with Presidential Candidate John McCain
It was as surreal as it sounds, partly because we cannot fathom how parts of the country would have responded if one of Barack Obama’s daughters was pregnant out of wedlock at the time and her teenage son was making all of these appearances.
But Anyway:
Bristol and Levi’s son, Tripp Easton Mitchell Johnston, was born in December 2008, but the two broke off their engagement in March 2009. And we haven’t heard much from Levi since…
…Until Now!
Because Johnston will actually appear on upcoming episodes of Teen Mom 2! As you can tell, we’re blown away by this development.
How Do We Know?
Because Johnston’s wife, Sunny, was asked if she and Levi were going to be on the MTV reality series and she simply responded, “yes.”
Sunny Days are Here!
Indeed, Johnston married Sunny Oglesby on October 28, 2012. A month prior to the wedding, the couple’s first daughter, Breeze Beretta Johnston, was born. Their second daughter, Indy Rae Johnston, was then born in January of 2015.
Will They Be Series Regulars?
No. Sunny later added that the pair will not be joining as official cast members. “Nope!” she replied when another follower inquired. “Never been a teen mom. Hubby was a teen dad though.”
Do Bristol and Levi Get Along?
Yes, actually. Bristol recently wrote the following as an Instagram caption: “so proud of my son, and super thankful for his dad and step mom for providing him with such incredible life learning experiences at such a young age!!”
But Here’s the Thing…
Bristol wrote that in response to a photo of nine-year old Tripp standing over a dead caribou that he and his dad killed. Palin herself came under fire for the image, which she defended thusly: “(and please before you start calling peta – remember where your beef/chicken come from.. it doesn’t get more organic than this).”
Thank You, Farrah Abraham
The incredible additions of Levi and Bristol are only possible because Farrah Abraham was fired/resigned from the show due to her affilation with amateur porn. We very much appreciate her strong stance on that topic and how it has led us here.
Do the Other OGs Care That Bristol is Joining Their Show?
Sort of. They care that they weren’t consulted before MTV hired her. “I think me and Catelynn [Lowell] and Amber [Portwood] are all pretty much on the same page,” Maci Bookout said about the addition, adding: “Give us a call and be like, ‘Hey, by the way, this is who your new cast member is going to be. it’s being released today. … We’ve been doing this for 10 years!”
But Does She Have a Problem with Bristol Herself?
Not yet. “You can’t be mad at somebody for accepting an opportunity,” she says.
Will Maci’s Tune Change When She Learns That Palin is Making a $250,000 Salary?
Yes, we think it might.
What Has Bristol Said About Coming on Board?
“I am excited to join MTV’s Teen Mom OG I look forward to sharing my experiences and hope that I can help others on their journey,” she wrote on Instagram.
What Has Sarah Palin Said?
“Bristol’s gonna be a great messenger for overcoming a little bit of challenge and doing well in life,” adding that she ay also appear on the show: “Whatever Bristol needs, whatever she wants and whatever my grandbabies need or want, I’m there.”
So… Bristol Palin, Sarah Palin and Levi Johnson Could ALL Be on New Episodes of Teen Mom OG?
Please, MTV, for the love of God, announce a premiere date already. We need to cancel our plans for the following several months after you do. (UPDATE: It premieres on October 1.)