Demi Lovato decided to hold a Q&A session with fans on Twitter.
It didn’t go so well after Demi answered an innocuous question with a story that shocked and horrified a sizable chunk of her fans.
Demi tells fans that she once pulled a prank on her bodyguard by hiring a sex worker to surprise him.
She says that the sex worker groped his genitals during the process.
Demi shares this in a single tweet — and we do have to remember that sometimes people leave out important details while condensing a story.
But, to many, it sounds like she solicited someone to sexually harass one of her employees, and ultimately shares the blame for him being groped.
Though the bodyguard himself defended Demi, fans point out that an employee defending his boss isn’t exactly surprising.
The discourse among fans is actually really interesting, and both sides make really good points. Take a look.
This is how it starts
We’re not sure why Demi decided to be this honest in answering the fan Q&A. She could have said something less controversial. She has since deleted this tweet.
Demi did not like the responses
Fans, as you can imagine, did not like Demi comparing a story about sexual harassment to, uh, jellybeans. So … technically, she was right — people were pretty pissed about her jellybeant weet.
Demi tried to defend herself
Wiord to the wise: “I was abused” is not a get-out-of-jail-free card. Unfortunately, some people who survive abuse can be very problematic as adults.
Demi then “apologizes”
This, folks, is not an apology. She’s sort of saying that she regrets that other people reacted negatively to her statement. We’ve all “apologized” like this and we know that it’s what you say when you think that what you did was right.
The bodyguard spoke up
Before he saw the discourse, Max just replied with a see-no-evil monkey emoji. Given the context, it sounds like he was not especially bothered by the prank.
Max then defends Demi
When someone sexually harasses another person, is it sexual harassment if they say that it’s okay? Is that still the case if the person is an employee? The world is complicated.
So … case closed?
As fans will explain in their really interesting discussions, Max laughing off the prank doesn’t necessarily make it okay.
As we mentioned, folks did not enjoy the jellybeans tweet
Even if Demi is right and her prank on her bodyguard was completely above-board and only sounded bad, trivializing her fans’ concerns by comparing it to “jellybeans” is … not a great look.
The fan arguments followed
Women are generally horrified when their genitals are grabbed without consent. Because of societal expectations, many men are taught that they should welcome the exact same attention if it comes from an attractive woman.
But maybe Demi didn’t describe it well?
Here, these two fans talk about how some people would already have an understanding that something like this prank is okay. Perhaps Demi should have tweeted that instead of talking about jellybeans.
Maybe Demi and Max have an understanding about this
Demi doesn’t sound like someone who would laugh if she didn’t believe that her bodyguard was okay.
Are fans blaming the wrong person?
We have to say that this sex worker sounds like she’s not the best representation for sex workers in general.
Like we said, this fan discourse gets really interesting
She has a point. Even in our largely sex-negative society, if a man is groped by an attractive woman, he is expected to welcome the attention — at worst, to brush it off regretfully if he is married. This can lead to men not voicing complaints about sexual harassment or even sexual assault.
So … should Demi have just spoken more clearly?
It may be that Demi just didn’t communicate this story properly. It happens. It also may be that, whether or not Demi is guilty of sexual harassment, this should have been one of those stories that doesn’t get shared on Twitter.