90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days Season 5, Episode 7 had a lot of moments of transition for the couples, some more painful than others.
Elijah keeps his promise to Alina, using Never Have I Ever to force her to tell Caleb her secret.
Ben makes his way to the airport, where Mahogany Who Is Surely A Real Person texts him some disappointing news.
Ella fears that Johnny is using the pandemic as an excuse to not see her … and worries if there’s an underlying issue.
Jasmine leaves Gino alone to attend her own divorce party, where her hypocrisy is on full display.
Kimberly voices her frustrations to Usman, with a surprising result.
Memphis’ trip to Tunis to get marriage paperwork is totally sabotaged by Hamza’s poor planning, and she has to rethink some things.
Having spent time alone with Mike, Ximena has noticed some “gross” issues that she hopes that he will work to fix.
Caleb Greenwood and Alina Kasha
It’s been some time since Alina and Caleb first boned, and now they’re at dinner with Elijah before he returns to Russia.
There was an awkward incident the night before
Elijah — who has a key to Alina’s room — had to retrieve something that he left there, so he walked in. Unfortunately, he walked in on Caleb and Alina while they were having sex. Many people have had this experience, especially while in shared living spaces (like college), and it can happen when groups of people are on vacation. Elijah played it cool. Caleb mostly sounds annoyed.
Caleb has complicated feelings about Elijah leaving
On the one hand, he and Elijah have not really gotten along. On the other, helping to accommodate Alina is second nature to Elijah, while Caleb is just learning — and he appreciates all that Elijah has done for her.
Before he goes, Elijah has a plan
He suggests to the group that they play a game of Never Have I Ever. It’s a little juvenile (it’s a classic college drinking game).
Caleb has slept with over 100 women
Elijah was clearly targeting Caleb with this, and Caleb admitted to it. That’s actually not all that many for a single guy in his late 20s. Sleeping with over 100 people would have been very impressive (or scandalous) back when people got married at 19, but Caleb is a hot, very fit 28-year-old who has traveled all over the world. He’s been run through, and there’s nothing wrong with that — though Alina does admit that she is a little surprised at his body count.
But neither Caleb nor Elijah have ever had a threesome
That’s a little surprising on both counts, actually. In Caleb’s case, because hooking up with multiple people sometimes happens organically and you’d think that it would have just happened at some point for him. In Elijah’s because, and if we can put this as tastefully as possible, in some communities, there are fewer logistical issues to deal with and threesomes are just easier.
It’s Elijah’s turn again
He asks who among them has harbored a big secret from their partner, whom they have known for 13 years. That’s Alina, and everybody knows it. Awkwardly, with the cat halfway out of the bag, she promises Caleb to go into it when they’re back at the room, but doesn’t want to talk about it at the restaurant. This was Elijah keeping his word by forcing the conversation to happen sooner rather than later.
It’s time
Crawling into bed with Caleb, Alina is anxious about telling him. She is very attached to him and this relationship, but he has repeatedly dragged his heels in terms of any kind of commitment. She worries that this revelation could be a setback.
Alina tells him
She was living with her ex when she and Caleb first reconnected. This was the case for months, and she didn’t tell him. And when they first spoke — initially, as friends who were simply reconnecting — she and her ex weren’t exes yet.
Caleb understands the hesitation, but …
… As Alina feared, he does suggest that this — her not telling him this until they’re in Turkey — is another solid reason for them to avoid rushing into a long term commitment as they continue to get to know each other better in person.
Ben Rathbun and Mahogany Roca
Ben is getting read for his flight to meet Mahogany, with whom he has never video chatted, in just a few hours. He has booked separate hotel rooms, because part of what drew him to his alleged girlfriend — who is less than half his age — is their shared conservative Christian views.
Ben’s family is not exactly supportive
But his son, Elijah, does give him a ride to the airport. It gives them a chance to talk (for Elijah to express very reasonable concerns) before Ben leaves on his trip.
At the airport, disaster strikes
Ben gets a text message — while waiting for his flight — that Mahogany’s dad doesn’t trust his intentions or want him to come. This is when he reveals that they were previously going to meet in person, but Mahogany texted him three days before the flight to ask him to wait for another time — when he could meet his parents. Ben, who appears to be taking all of this at face value, wants to win over Mahogany’s parents.
Ben tries to calm her
He doesn’t seem to think that this last minute attempt to get him to cancel, coupled with the lack of communication leading up to this bad news, is anything but a relationship issue. Declaring himself to be an optimist, Ben boards the flight anyway after sending Mahogany a list of reassuring texts.
Ella Johnson and Johnny
Ella has just found out that Johnny’s visa application to Singapore was denied, interfering with their plans. This is not the first time that the bottom has fallen out from their attempts to bring him to visit her, she reveals, and it’s hard to take.
Ella meets with her bestie, Korbie, and Korbie’s husband, Pao
She has a new plan, she reveals, which is to get Johnny to her by way of Dubai. But Johnny is balking at this.
Johnny is worried about traveling during the pandemic
Ella is worried — and her friends share this concern — that there’s something beyond COVID-19 (and, specifically, the Delta variant) that has Johnny dragging his heels like this.
Pao has a guess, and it’s a very smart one
He asks how Johnny’s parents feel. Specifically, would they prefer that he date and marry another woman from China? (We already know this to be true) Ella says that it’s possible, but that he has not told her this if so.
Later, Ella speaks to him
While she is always happy to speak to Johnny, she feels like all of these starts and stops are playing with her emotions in a cruel way. Even if he doesn’t mean to be hurtful, this has to stop.
Johnny’s afraid of visiting at all during the Delta wave
Remember the Delta wave? Johnny was watching the number of infections and deaths rise and rise in the United States. He tells Ella that the nightmarish healthcare system that plagues America makes him afraid to bankrupt himself if he has to be hospitalized during a visit. In China (and also almost all developed countries; there is no reason that America has to be like this), hospitalizations have low to zero costs. In America, getting cancer or COVID can cost your home and your entire family’s financial future. Johnny is not unreasonable in his concerns (although of course being vaccinated drastically reduces the risks of hospitalization).
Ella suggests that it’s worth a manageable risk to see each other
Johnny explains that this is what people in China call “American thinking.” He frames it in a very fair and honestly charitable way, noting that Americans are very “brave” but that, in his lived experience, Asians are more cautious and abide by restrictions to protect themselves and each other.
Ella asks if his parents are opposed to them being together
Johnny says that they’re happy for him, which is a half-truth, and confesses to the cameras that he doesn’t want his parents to interfere with this relationship like they did with his ex. Ella tells Johnny that they need a real, viable plan because she needs to know if they’ll be together or not.
Gino Palazzolo and Jasmine Pineda
Jasmine is having a divorce party! Her friends are throwing it, because though she’s been done with her ex for five years or so, their marriage is formally no more.
But Gino is not invited
Jasmine explains that it’s not a slight against him, but it would be “creepy” to involve her boyfriend. Nobody’s boyfriends are coming, so it’s not just Gino.
Gino helps her get ready
Things are still a little uneasy after yesterday’s screaming explosion … over wall paint. Still, Gino stays behind while Jasmine goes to her party.
To Jasmine!
Jasmine’s friends gather ’round. We have already met Leo, of course, but the fact that she has this many friends is probably a good indication that Jasmine’s bouts of extreme rage are directed at partners, not friends. That doesn’t make it better, of course.
Jasmine knows that she has issues
She explains her explosive fit and admits that it was over the paint on the walls of Gino’s Michigan home. Her friends remind her that she’s nuts. Jasmine acts like it’s a fun quirk instead of alarming emotional abuse.
Jasmine has her good qualities, also
She describes having rocked Gino’s world with sex, suggesting that he was accustomed to very vanilla sexual encounters before her.
The party has scarcely begun
Jasmine’s friends have hired a stripper for her party, and he enters wearing military fatigues. He does not keep them on for long.
A bit hypocritical, right?
Plenty of people are fine with their spouses attending parties with a stripper. Plenty of people are not. Ultimately, this is something for partners to work out together. What makes Jasmine’s case unique is that Gino merely mentioning an ex of his (even if she brought it up) sends her into a spiral of fury.
Even Jasmine recognizes the double standard
She didn’t plan to have the stripper there, but it was her divorce party — and, she hopes, her only divorce party. So she just went with it.
In context, Jasmine feels that Gino shouldn’t be jealous
Of course, she just described all sex workers — from strippers to cam models to full service sex workers to porn stars. They’re all “professionals doing their jobs.” That doesn’t mean that employing their services isn’t (or is) cheating. Again, this can only be worked out between partners.
The party visits Gino
You know when you’ve been working or maybe you’re just getting up for work and there are people in your house, some of whom you don’t know, and they are MUCH more in the party spirit than you are and you try to be polite but you’re not totally sure how to respond to a group of cheerful drunk people when you’re not in that headspace? Well, that’s Gino in this moment as Jasmine’s buddies pop in to see him.
Of course, they didn’t just come by to say “hi”
They also show Gino video of Jasmine and the stripper as he grinds himself against her. It’s a provocative moment.
It’s a lot for Gino to process
Jasmine’s friends realize that they need to let the two of them talk, so they clear out.
Gino does a very good job of expressing his feelings
He explains how he feels, and lays out that he knows that Jasmine would not be okay if he’d done this. Jasmine agrees. She also assures him that she is only interested in him.
Kimberly Menzies and Usman Umar
Usman is still riding high on how happy Kimberly made him by taking charge and scolding his entourage during his music video’s production. The video is filmed, so he can give Kimberly his full attention.
The two go out shopping
It’s exactly what Kimberly has wanted — them spending time together and being cute out in public. Well, it’s not EVERYTHING that she’s wanted, but it’s a start. Also she brings up Michael Jackson multiple times. It really takes commitment for someone to still stan that particular late celebrity in 2021, because … yikes.
Kimberly then presses Usman for more
He feels that she is pushing him to commit to this being more than a hand-holding, thigh-as-a-pillow friendship, while Kimberly feels like the clock is ticking on them figuring out if this is a relationship or not.
Usman says that he was very clear
In his mind, separate rooms drove the message home that things weren’t necessarily going to go very far, while Kimberly saw it as a temporary redundancy.
Things are a little awkward
Kimberly repeatedly tells Usman that she doesn’t want to hold his hand right now. In her mind, she has spoken to Usman now about what she wants, and the proverbial ball is in his court.
Later that night …
Kimberly is woken up when Usman comes to visit later that night. You know what? I was thinking that Kimberly’s bold move would backfire, but this is definitely progress.
But he’s not visiting to bone
Like two platonic friends sharing a bed for a night, they set up an extra pillow between them to avoid any accidental (or, in this case, intentional) touching.
It’s cute …
But it’s probably a very good reminder to not buy a PS5 and a Macbook Pro for someone on the first day. Save those presents for after the pipe is laid, right?
Memphis Smith and Moknii Hamza
The two are packing up for an overnight trip to Tunis, which is hours away, where they will get the paperwork needed for Memphis to marry Hamza there.
It’s one disaster after another
Memphis already had to shoot down Hamza’s poorly conceived “let’s take the bus” backup plan, and then his friend Youssef — who generously offered to drive them — has to make a side trip to get some paperwork. With these setbacks, they’re not going to make it to the embassy that day.
Memphis has concerns
Hamza has lied to her multiple times. Their one time having sex so far was terrible. Now, he’s not even taking preparing to marry her seriously enough to plan it right. She worries that he’s acting like a child, and that this would carry over if they were to marry.
Once in Tunis, she changes her tune
The hotel room is amazing. Genuinely, it is both gorgeous and romantic. Memphis is over the moon. She and Hamza go get vodka together. Hamza rarely drinks, but he does drink with Memphis because she is special to him.
The plan is to get the paperwork the next day
However, Memphis does make absolutely sure that Hamza understands: if they don’t marry during this trip, then the relationship ends.
Mike Berk and Ximena Cuellar
On their romantic vacation as a couple, Ximena gets up to go get coffee … and to call her sister.
Ximena has seen some red flags about Mike
First, there’s his laundry, which he leaves around everywhere — taking off his clothes and tossing them onto the floor at times. Second, he will burb in front of people. Third, he has passed gas in front of her … while they were kissing … which grossed her out.
These things seem childlike to her
Ximena does not want to feel like Mike is another child. He’s a man who’s like a decade older than she is, but to her, he’s acting like one of her very young sons.
Ximena speaks to Mike
She talks about all of it — the clothes, the belching, the flatulence — and says that, in no uncertain terms, these must change.
Mike is stunned that she sees these as problems
Two things are at play here. The first is that different people have different hangups. For example, many people do not consider belching rude except in certain circumstances. Some people are, as unthinkable as it may be, casual about flatulence. Ximena is neither of these types of person. The second thing that’s going on is that Mike is a single guy who’s been single since high school, and he lives with his father and grandfather. He’s accustomed to their standards for these things, and not to anyone else’s.
Ximena is firm about this
She loves Mike, but wants him to adjust his behavior. Meanwhile, Mike worries that some of this can’t really be controlled, and seems to feel like Ximena is shaming him for bodily functions.