Do not ever doubt the lengths politicians will go to in order to raise funds.
Case in point: Hillary Clinton posed for a selfie with Kim Kardashian at an expensive dinner in Los Angeles.
Other cases in point: the following pieces of swag, all of which are real and actually on sale on the official websites of various candidates…
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
For $35, fans of Rand Paul can wish other fans of Rand Paul a happy birthday… with this three-foot tall birthday card. It comes with an equally gigantic envelope.
Grillary Clinton
Look, we love puns as much as the next guy. Ok, fine: we love puns even more than the next guy. But Grillary Clinton?!? This is something a serious President candidate is selling.
A Marco Polo
This totally wins. Marco Rubio is selling a polo shirt with his name on it. Get it? A Marco Polo!
A Bobby Jindal T-Shirt
There’s nothing too funny about this shirt, really, although the slogan could use some work. We mostly wanted to see if people knew Jindal was running for President.
Mugging for the Camera
Okay, so Rick Perry dropped out early. And a PAC of the former nominee was selling this shirt, not the man himself. But still. It’s a shirt that uses Rick Perry’s mug shot! And it’s PRO Rick Perry!
Hillary, I’ll See Your Pun and Raise You…
Jeb Bush is selling a guacamole bowl on his website for $75. It is called the Guaca Bowle.
A Jeb Bush Koozie!
This one comes to us from the The Millenials Rising PAC. It retails for $8, which is likely more than the beer it is keeping away from your bare hand.
Chillary Clinton
Hillary is not to be outdone in the koozie game. Or, once again, in the pun game.
The Bernie Bear!
This item is not meant to raise funds for Bernie Sanders. But The Vermont Teddy Bear Company commemorated its representative-turned-presidential-candidate with the “Bernie Bear.” It sells for $79.99. Look at that hair!
Hillary Clinton’s “Everyday Pantsuit Tee”
This is a $30 t-shirt made to look like your basic, everyday pantsuit. No pun this time around. Just totally rad fashion.
I Like Mike
Nothing too fancy here for Mike Huckabee. We’re just excited for a rival to come out with a “Drop the Mike” shirt.
Don’t Drone Me, Bro!
Love him or hate him or think he’s crazy, you must admire Rand Paul for putting actual platform messages on his pieces of apparrel.