Welcome, celebrity news readers. Below, The Hollywood Gossip breaks down all the scandals, couples and craziness of the last seven days in its Week in Review.
Follow THG on Twitter and Facebook for 24/7/365 updates. Right now, join us as we look back on the week that was in the world of celebrity news and gossip:
Both embattled, A-list couples are fighting off cheating rumors.
- Brittney Jones, some random girl, swears Ashton Kutcher hit that.
- Irma Nici, a random prostitute, says David Beckham tapped it.
- Lindsay Lohan failed a drug test and may be jailed as a result
- Paris Hilton, meanwhile, pleaded guilty and thus avoided jail.
- Bruno Mars was popped on drug possession charges in Vegas.
- Bryan Masche, of Raising Sextuplets fame, was also arrested.
- Randy and Evi Quaid were caught squatting in their old house.
- Joe Guidice was jailed as well. Busy week for the police blotter.
- Russell Brand went off on a photographer to defend Katy Perry.
Do not mess with the Brands. They will throw down!
- Speaking of Katy, she was deemed too hot for Sesame Street.
- Phew. Miley Cyrus FINALLY explained a whole bunch of stuff.
- The time has come at last. You can sleep with Justin Bieber.
- No, seriously. You don’t even have to be Jasmine Villegas.
- Lady Gaga took on John McCain and “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.”
- It looks like Oksana Grigorieva tried to shake down Mel.
- Conrad Murray may call Michael Jackson’s kids to testify.
- Karissa Shannon has given her sex tape the green light.
- A new season of drama began on Dancing With the Stars.
Obligatory Robert Pattinson-Kristen Stewart pic. Enough. Said.
- Robsten was spotted in New Orleans. It was just as hot as you think.
- Octomom is having some serious financial problems. What a shock.
- Kevin Mauer wants to shred Danielle Staub. We wish him the best.
- Kim Kardashian and Miles Austin are like 100 percent over. 100!
- Meanwhile, she really laments all that Botox. Breaking news.
- Spencer Pratt, Heidi Montag reunited, posed for hilarious pics.
- Kim Zolciak is an unbelievable singer. This is a must-listen.
- The new, star-studded panel is confirmed on American Idol.
- The new star of The Bachelor is … Brad Womack! Again!