Some woman, who is obviously very normal and in touch with reality, says she has found Jesus hiding inside a bag of Cheetos.
Shockingly, it’s not Britney Spears.
Her name is Kelly Ramey, and when she opened a snack-sized bag of Cheetos, she felt something very unusual and spiritual inside.
Most of her family and friends believe it looks like a mini sculpture of Jesus Christ. Ramey and her husband call it “Cheesus.”
A local minister, meanwhile, does not see anything theologically special about the Cheeto, but thinks “some good could come from it.”
Definitely. Feeding it to Jayden James, perhaps. You know Britney is reading this story and frickin’ foaming at the mouth right now.
Behold, the object of Britney Spears sinful, wanton lust.