Last month, rumors that Kylie Jenner is pregnant with Tyga’s baby circulated on social media, and since Kylie lives her life on Instagram, she probably paused momentarily to wonder if she really was pregnant.
Maybe she felt around a bit for any tell-tale bumps, gasped, then remembered those were just the Kylie Jenner breast implants she’s read about on Twitter.
Once she realized she was not, in fact, expecting any Tyga kittens, she decided to prove it with one of those Kylie Jenner underwear selfies that people on Facebook are always talking about.
Yes, that was an extremely high-concept way to say:
Hey, look! It’s Kylie Jenner in her underwear again!
We’ve seen semi-nude Kylie many times over the years, but this time, she’s half-naked with a purpose.
Rumors that Kylie is knocked up seem to surface about once a year, but this time they were buoyed by Kylie lying low due to an illness.
Sources say she canceled a scheduled appearance on James Corden’s Late, Late Show due to the flu last week.
We would’ve guessed it was simply because she decided that if she wants to ride shotgun while an overweight British guy belts out Britney Spears songs she could just hitchhike outside Piers Morgan’s house.
But apparently lots of other people thought the reason Kylie bailed was so that she could hide her baby bump.
The reasoning never really made much sense, as Kylie’s family lives for dumb fashion statements.
If she wanted to go on TV and still hide the fact that she’s pregnant, she could just rock a barrel with suspenders and say it’s from Kanye’s Naked Guy in a Silent Movie line.
No one would even bat an eye.
But anyway, Kylie’s not pregnant.
Or at least if she is, she’s not showing yet.
Of course, if she were pregnant and didn’t want us to know, she would probably have plenty of old selfies she could post to throw us off the trail for months!
We hope Donald Trump reads this so that he knows to appoint Kylie Secretary of the ‘Gram.
If that’s not a cabinet post, it really should be.