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This is actually a true story:

The police were called to Lindsay Lohan’s house last night, due to an alarm malfunction.

Once they got there, officers on the scene thought the house had been burglarized because it was so messy. An NBC affiliate reports that LAPD officer Karen Rayner asked:

“Is it normally like this, or did the intruders do it?”

We tell that story because, well, it’s hilarious. But it also speaks to the depths to which Lindsay has sunk, making Dina Lohan’s recent comments about her daughters that much more troublesome (and, well, hilarious).

The World’s Worst Mother told Life & Style that “Lindsay is a good person to have watch over Ali right now. Lindsay can show Ali the ropes. Ali’s out there working on her record and singing career.”

If “ropes” is a euphemism for drugs, alcohol and sex with random men or women, then Dina is right. Ali is in ideal hands.