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Last week set the bar pretty high, but The Hills was still solid last night. As always, our recap will consist of us awarding and deducting points as we see fit.

Audrina Patridge is, like, still a mess over the scandalous Lauren Conrad-Justin-Bobby hookup that didn’t actually happen. She doesn’t know what to do next. Meanwhile, Speidi pays a visit to his Nana, and Spencer rips Stephanie a lot.

On to the rankings! Chime in with your own!

One second after showing up, Spencer Pratt rips Stephanie for decorating her kitchen like a bathroom. It’s like he was determined to fire off an insult at the first possible opportunity and that’s what he saw. Plus 3.

Obligatory Minus 5 for Heidi Montag‘s Times Square hooker / clubbing makeup. In broad daylight. At lunch with a nice old lady, no less. Tramp.

Whitney Port tells LC she’s still in touch with Jay Lyon, who writes “xo” after, like, every sentence when they text. OMG, so cute, mate. Plus 7.

My, Casey Patridge was wearing a colorful top in this episode. Oh, wait, those are just her tats. Plus 4. And Plus 2 more for her wise words.

Audzo ranted non-stop about Justin-Bobby, yet the dirtbag did not actually appear last night. Normally, this would be cause for celebration, but in this case his mumbled, idiotic remarks would have fostered even more drama. So Minus 4.

Audrina Patridge sort of admits that she jumped to conclusions and treated Lauren unfairly over this, but then cops a pathetic excuse, “I don’t even know who I am anymore” rather than just moving on. OMG, grow up, girl. Minus 9.

Not just a Brody Jenner sighting. A shirtless Brody Jenner sighting. Plus 16. And Plus 5 more for is query to LC about “banging Justin-Bobby.”

Speaking of the great BJ, that promo for Bromance was comically bad. But come on, we know we’re gonna watch that and The City. Plus 5.

Anyone else think Nana is kind of sweet? Maybe Spencer’s adopted. Plus 3.

Stephanie says Spencer wouldn’t be Nana’s “favorite” if she knew more about him. Riiight. Spencer has actually talked about Nana on numerous occasions in celebrity gossip tabloids! She has a scrapbook! Nice try, Steph. Minus 4.

TOTAL: +21. Leave a comment with your own scores!