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As the sports saying goes, Father Time is undefeated. Everybody ages eventually, even Hollywood’s rich and famous and attention-seeking reality TV stars.

Not all celebrities are created equal, however. 35 in Hollywood is not the same as 35 in McIntyre, Ga., as the side-by-side photo comparison below illustrates.

Yes, Mama June Shannon of Honey Boo Boo fame is 35!! WTH!?!

We repeat: Mama June is a grandmother while everybody’s high school crush JLH couldn’t find pay a guy to wife her up for the longest time. What a world.

Maybe we’re being unfair, but it’s undeniable that some people age better than others, whether it’s a result of alcohol, drugs, stress or plain ol’ genetics.

Female stars not named Lindsay Lohan tend to do a better job than men, too.

Perhaps men don’t put in the same kind of effort, or the onslaught of celebrity gossip scrutiny and latent industry sexism forces women to try to defy physics longer.

More men than women tend to rock the grays with pride. Just saying.

There are exceptions, of course, like Pharrell Williams, Jim Parsons and Jared Leto, all of whom are much older than you probably think. As is Halle Berry.

Intrigued yet? Open the gallery above. You won’t believe it.

So yeah, these celebrities are somehow the same age. Prepare to pick your jaws up off the floor and have some great fun facts to throw out at your holiday party.